The Existential Roots of Grief and Anxiety: What Your Symptoms Are Really Pointing To

When we feel the weight of grief or the restlessness of anxiety, our instinct is often to search for something to fix. Maybe it’s the job, the relationship, the schedule, or the sleep routine. But what if our symptoms are pointing us toward something deeper—something not broken, but profoundly human?

As an existential psychotherapist, I often sit with clients who have tried all the surface-level strategies and still find themselves caught in cycles of dread, sadness, or unease. That’s when we begin to ask different questions. Not “How do I make this go away?” but “What is this trying to tell me?”

Misunderstanding Anxiety and Grief

Culturally, we tend to pathologize anxiety and grief. Anxiety is framed as something to manage or suppress. Grief is something to “get over.” These narratives suggest that if we just work hard enough—exercise more, think positively, get organized—we can avoid pain altogether.

But pain, particularly in the form of grief and anxiety, often arises when we brush up against the limits of life: death, change, uncertainty, or the feeling of being alone in the world. When we view these experiences only through a medical or behavioral lens, we miss their existential dimension.

The Existential Givens

Existential therapy invites us to recognize the “givens” of human existence—truths that we all face at some point:

• Death: The awareness of our mortality can stir deep fear, but also deep appreciation.

• Freedom: The realization that we are responsible for shaping our lives can feel both liberating and overwhelming.

• Isolation: Even in loving relationships, we experience a fundamental “separateness” that can feel lonely or disorienting.

• Meaning: We are meaning-making creatures, and when life feels purposeless or fragmented, we suffer.

These existential concerns don’t always shout. Often, they whisper through symptoms—panic in the middle of the night, a sense of numbness, or questions like “What’s the point?” or “Who am I, really?”

What Meaning-Centered Counseling Offers

In meaning-centered counseling, the goal isn’t to silence these symptoms. It’s to listen to them. Therapy becomes a space where clients are invited to confront—not avoid—the realities of being human.

This isn’t about “fixing” grief or “curing” anxiety. It’s about making meaning in the midst of it. It’s about exploring identity, values, and choice in the face of uncertainty. It’s about connecting to what matters most, even when life feels fractured.

As an existential psychotherapist, I don’t offer quick answers. Instead, I offer a steady presence—a space where your experience is honored, and where your symptoms are seen not as pathology, but as signals. Together, we explore what those signals are pointing toward.

Moving Through, Not Around

The work of therapy is not to eliminate discomfort but to move through it with awareness and courage. When we begin to understand the deeper layers of our grief and anxiety, we start to feel less alone. We recognize that what we’re experiencing is part of the human condition—and that in facing it, we often find renewed clarity, connection, and strength.

If you're feeling overwhelmed by anxiety or the heaviness of grief, and suspect there's something deeper stirring beneath the surface, existential therapy may be a path worth exploring.

Interested in exploring your own existential questions?
I offer individual therapy for adults seeking depth, clarity, and meaning. Contact me to schedule a consultation.